MurphyTown Facts Haiku Irish Jokes Laws Legends News Photos Poems Proverbs Quotes Yin Jokes Index Top Ten Newest Search Post Prev Joke Joke 120 of 1756 Next Joke YOU NEED A NEW CAR WHEN ... _______________________________ You pull over to let a fire truck go by, and it stops behind you. You have to go to a repair center every thousand miles to get the duct tape replaced. You accidentally drive into a junkyard, drive out, and get accused of stealing. The Blue Book lists your car under "Health Risk." The only thing holding your bumper on is the "Dukakis/Bentsen '88" sticker. You return to your car and find someone broke in and left a hundred dollars and a new stereo. Evel Kneivel refuses a free lift. The valet puts on a crash helmet and full-body armor before parking your car. The guys at the repair shop refer you to Dr. Kevorkian. Random Joke SOCIALISM: You have two cows. State takes one and give it to someone else. COMMUNISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and gives you milk.... While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after ... I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the f... What do you think of this Joke? Vote Thumbs Up or Thumbs Down. Reputation: 0 / Feedback: 0